Words according to Dakota, SHE II, and Raven Vanguard’s third member, also known as Sloth
What oh what to talk about?
This week, I’ll start with the fact that I am quite possibly a workaholic that is in a constant struggle with responsibility. It is not that I don’t get things done, or that I am lazy, but I really do have relatively high expectations for myself and an unrealistic sense of what I should be able to push myself to accomplish. I am always pushing myself. To the point where I really should exercise restraint. You see, I have always tirelessly tried to become a Jack-of-MANY-Trades. Not a Jack of All, but many. More than just a few. Growing up, if I was not good at something, I’d keep trying to be good at it. That was not always achievable you see. I ate shit snowboarding. A lot. Was never good, never got the hang of it, and now I just hate falling in the snow. That was heartbreaking to me. The instant feeling of failure. These days, I can grasp that it is perfectly natural to not do EVERYTHING, and not be good at EVERYTHING. However, I could still use a reminder every now and then.
As of recently, within the past year, I have not only worked my 9-5 here at Raven. I have tried my hand at tattooing, apprenticing locally. I started my own little brand for commission based work. Through which I have done about 15-20 commissions this year. 5 of which are now t-shirts for brands, drift teams, and car clubs. I created my own t-shirt design and sold a limited batch of 50. Produced, printed, sold, and shipped out within a month. All of them. Bought a new computer to streamline my process. Slow down you say? What? Working 9-5 (some days 9:30-5:30, 10-6, 9:30-6:30, you get it) and then driving 40 minutes home, quickly eating dinner, and then working from 7/7:30 to 1 am every night is not normal?! You mean, my eyes shouldn’t be twitching?
Alas, yes. It is crazy and potentially unnecessary. However, it does pay off all my flights back and forth to Queens. Because at the end of the day, that has been the most important part of my week. Man, meeting someone that makes your heart sing and soul bloom is really something. It makes it all worth it.
That being said, is it totally crazy that I feel guilt for sitting down and watching Netflix? Shouldn’t I be working on something? Finishing something?! Working and working and working?! No, because sometimes it’s totally fine to sit. Vegetate. Laugh a little at some quality TV and go to sleep early. It’s okay to take nights off. Take care of your health. Take care of your mental state.
So this Once-Over is a reminder that it is okay to not be amazing at everything. And that it is great to learn new skills. But always keep in mind that taking a night off isn’t so bad after all. Stop putting so much pressure on yourself. And love yourself enough to know when you’re doing too much. Kick back, then go to bed. Cheers!